The Pirate That Wasn’t: A Tale of Ageing (Not So) Gracefully
Let me take you back to when I was 12 years old, cruising through the U.S. with my sister. We were crashing at a friend’s place, right on the beach in Santa Monica.
This guy had a seriously cool art collection, but one piece really grabbed me – a portrait of himself, but as an old dude. Really confusing stuff for a 12-year-old, and I just couldn’t get my head around why he’d want this freaky thing staring back at him every day.
When I finally summoned up the courage to ask, his explanation was a classic: the idea was that as he got older, he’d always look better than the painting. Simple as that. And you know what? In a weird, twisted kind of way, it actually made a bit of sense.
Fast forward many years, to my 30th birthday. Inspired by that memory, I thought, “Right, my turn!” So, I decided to whip up my own artistic guess of what 40-year-old me might look like.
Well, turns out, my crystal ball was seriously out of whack. I was way off. The seafaring pirate vibe I’d envisioned? Yeah, nah, didn’t happen. And you’d think I would’ve remembered my part-Indonesian genes aren’t exactly famous for producing epic beards. Total rookie error.
Anyway, I stumbled across this digital relic the other day while trawling through a bunch of old music files I was making around the same time. And the kicker? The file was titled ‘Ageing Gracefully’. Man, the irony.
For those playing at home, this masterpiece was put together in Adobe Illustrator and Photoshop CS3, using an ancient Wacom tablet. I even recall mucking around with some Photoshop actions that have probably gone the way of the dodo, which means trying to replicate this bad boy today would be a mission and a half.
Device: MacBook Pro 2008 Model & Wacom Tablet
Apps: Illustrator & Photoshop
